Nusrat Jahan
It is kind of creepy how obsessed society is with female sexuality. Whether it is an explicit music video, the free-the-nipple movement, or “virgin clubs” (yes, they are a thing), society is hell-bent in trying to control a girl’s sexuality.
From diaper days, throughout adolescence, and even in their adult lives, girls are taught some absolutely absurd things about sex.
Below is a list of some of them:
•Virginity: What is virginity to be exact? According to the general definition, it is simply penis-in-vagina penetration. However, this definition does not take into account rape or emotional intimacy. On the other hand, some people use virginity as way of showcasing purity i.e. if a girl does not bleed the first time, she is trash. What people do not know is that bleeding occurs due to pressure on hymen which causes it to break, and that pressure can be due to different things like riding a bicycle or working out too hard.
•Vagina=Women: In case you did not know, not all women have vaginas.
•The first time hurts: Do you know why you feel pain during intercourse? Because you get so nervous that your muscles get tense. *sigh* If only you knew that it would not hurt much and hence could relax and enjoy, right?
•Vaginas get stretched: No. Too much sex will not make your vagina look like a worn out hair scrunchie.
•Boys buy the condoms: You are equally responsible for safe sex as is your partner. You buy your condoms yourself and do not always rely on him. This goes for other things too, like paying the bill!
•You must wax- Why? So that you can fit into the social construct of what is defined as beautiful? Why bother though? Go around and embrace your beautiful hairiness. Well, of course, some parts need to be shaved for hygiene purposes, but it is not a hard and fast rule to make sure your arms are as smooth as butter. Plus, who has the time right?
•Period sex- Beware, it is possible to get pregnant or get infected with a Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD) even during periods.
•Sexual harassment is normal- Sadly, in Bangladesh, it is the norm. But that is only because we instill the concept that if you are a woman then you are bound to get “teased” sometimes. When we stop teaching this to our kids and start telling them that any sort of intimate physical contact without a person’s permission is a crime, this weird social concept will blur out.